I’ve seen this issue come and go with our instance (usually resolved in less than a day), but also recall it being a Lemmy-wide issue, too.
A minor trick I’ve used since then has been to sticky any post I make in my sublemmy, then come back to it in an hour or so and unsticky if it seems to be getting ‘normal’ votes. The point being that for the segment of people who like checking your community directly, they can more easily see the new content, compared to those who browse FAVORITES or ALL to see same content.
I know it’s not much, but it’s helped me a bit during such federating outages.
Matey, I’m not here to put people down or be rude, mean, or hurtful, but man… it does seem like you got some issues to work out.