… 50ml bottles containing Absolut brand vodka with torn clothing stuffed into them …

What are these? Molotov cocktails for ants?

There are many better choices for automatic pistol today than the 1911.

What is there not to get? New and improved butthole and weiner art coming soon.

Heemeyer was a dick, not a folk hero.

Yeah, running the cable is probably not as big a deal as it seems at first glance. The wall plates are easy, use a fish tape to pull the cable through where you need to.

11. Fuck shit up.

He was foaming at the mouth before, too, but he’s also foaming at the mouth right now.

“The Trump Administration arrested 538 illegal immigrant criminals …”

I am taking particular note that 538 is also the number of members of Congress.

This is honestly the best case scenario at this point.

Scurvy rates, too!

Cheech Marin, too.

https://youtu.be/IRsPheErBj8

On the Internet.

I mean, really, shouldn’t women have their own stores to buy this stuff in? This would protect women from the lustful gaze of men, too!

How much crack could a craccoon crack if a craccoon could crack crack?

What he says is important to know. I’m mainly all done with the panel of newspeople all kvetching about it and trying to predict what might happen.

Excellent choice. This has been how I’ve chosen to consume news in the wake of the election, and it’s been working out well.

I’m 54, and I’m fussy.

No matter where I am, I always have a sketch in my head as to what “leaving” would be like. How long it would take in total, then for each leg:

• Stand up
• Pick up coat
• “Welp.”
• Put on coat
• Walk to door
• Open door
• Make one last witty comment before closing door behind me
• Walk to car
• Open car door
• Sit down
• Foot on brake
• Turn key to START
• When engine is running, release ignition key to ON position
• Seatbelt
• Steering wheel
• click Reverse
• Release brake
• Rear view while backing up
• Steer onto street
• Apply brake
• click click Drive
• GO

This is obviously different if I’m somewhere where I have not taken my own car and have to depend on alternate transportation, whether that be:

• Public transit
• Catch a ride with someone else
• Rideshare/taxi
• Walking
• Rental bike/e-bike/e-scooter
• Canal boat
• Slip-N-Slide
• Pneumatic tube
• Quantum tunnelling
• Window
• Magic[k]
• Hiding until everyone else leaves
• Go to sleep

Imagine that.