“Oh my gosh, your map is so unrealistic, why does your river split like this?” “Because this section of river was once ruled by married river spirits, but they got a divorce and took half each. This town between them has banned marriage counselors, lest the river swallow up the land once more.”

Nope. The rules for falling on a creature don’t factor in size, except for if it knocks the target prone. The check is DC15 to dodge.

“Okay, so he gets to make a dexterity saving throw… That’s a 16, so he manages to sidestep you and you take the full damage. …No, he doesn’t have disadvantage, you made a huge shadow above him, he knew you were coming. Anyway, he continues his monologue, using your actions as an example of the foolishness of humanity.”

Ah, so you’re in denial about your vore fetish!

“Oh, no, not like that. I just take her on a journey through pain and pleasure, tell her what to do, act out wild fantasies, bring her to the brink of tears and have her thank me for it. You know, roleplaying. We actually have a bunch of other guys who do it with us. It’s not weird or anything. If you’d like, I wouldn’t mind having you too!”

Sorry, I’m not quite sure how a picture mocking a specific person for something other than race is racist, let alone deeply so.