- tried to stay positive, then misfortune strikes
- tried making friends, ended up ghosted
- tried looking for better job, then scammed
- tried save money, inflation happens
- tried sell product online, fees and tax cut, also less buyers.
- tried theraphy, the solution only dont think about it, its okay (if only it was that easy)
- tried being nice, taken advantage of
- tried being honest, get hatred
- tried religion, yet god let million of nice person suffers
- tried sleep, need regular medication
- tried work hard, ended up surgery and years of rehabilitation
at this point, i am so tired with whatever i do, it always doesnt work.
right now i can relate why some people choose to become evil person, because being good and nice person in this world is just not as rewarding as bad people does. even those people who ghosted and bullied me ended up becoming rich and succesful, and here i am struggle everyday. life is really unfair world.
It’s its own reward. It doesn’t matter what the outcome is.
Capitalism
totally agreed
Because other ppl compensate for you the other way around until they get sick of you
It’s not less rewarding but I can agree, more exhausting.
Religion doesn’t make sense to me either really, but stepping on other people to gain material wealth would not feel rewarding.
Can you maybe be more specific about how you want to be good in the world and let a little bit of the other stuff slide? You can’t fix everything, and remember YOU are also a person you should be good to. Being selfless is hurting at least one person.
If you need medication to sleep and feel ok, there’s probably something going on with your mental health. Not anything to do with whether you are “good” or “bad” just something to tackle so you can function in your life.
my mental health is seriously impacted since bad things keep coming and coming like storm never ends, it is really hard to stay being good in the world when you are in this condition (if you need some example then you can try watch movie joker from batman)
Yes I agree external conditions can harm you, but it’s also true that the only thing you really have control over is yourself, your reactions, your actions, your inner dialogue, and so on. You aren’t likely to be able to influence other people or events much.
I can say - if you can make it through a bad time, things do often get better - they did for me. If you are surrounded by toxic people find new people, and also if you are seeing someone for your mental health make sure you tell them what’s going on.
the question is when it gets better? its been awhile since i am suffering too many problem and it is not getting better.
i did tell whats going on, and not many that really actually cares or they just give template answer like “everything is okay” while the reality it is not.
Ok let me tell you what I think about life.
Baseline existence would be to be paralyzed and in pain, blind and deaf. There are people in this situation. I do agree that they have it bad - the only thing they are getting out of life is physical existence nothing else. They don’t have much to be happy about at all. Some of them manage to, but I couldn’t.
You and me though? We can hear, see, taste, touch, have much of our time without constant physical pain. Can read, hear music, dance, eat good food, enjoy a beautiful day, see a cute cat or dog. I just enjoy being physically embodied so much, and appreciate how good I have it.
Specifically though, as you are asking, the outward stuff got better in my early 40s. More money, better relationships, better job, gained some weight (I have mixed feelings about that but do feel physically healthier not underweight). Better emotional regulation, less hot-headed.
If you have some bad friends, find better people. If it’s you who are the constant in the bad friendships though, you may need to consider that you may be the problem. Jobs are kinda different, I do think even sort of awful people can be successful in the right professional position.
well i havent mentioned this but i do have some physical damage from third degree burn plus surgery and years of rehabilitation plus incurable disease i had since kid and also in constant mentally drained, i hardly able to enjoy anything even doing my hobbies, right now it all tastes bland.
and with that condition, i am still forced to deal with so many bad situation i told in this post, to the point that i feel life is pointless and just waiting game for me.
good to hear that your life is getting better in 40s, i hope my life will also get better even thou i dont know when or will it happen or not, nobody knows. i just wish it happens sooner for me, i just really at my limits.
i already tried to find better people as i said this post but ended up ghosted, and scammed by tax and business platform, world really filled with bad and cruel people. plus jobs market is not looking good too.
i am just tired already, if only i can time out or surrender like a game, then i already do.
Being a nice and good person is its own reward. It doesn’t matter if you were nice and got taken advantage of. What matters is that you were nice. It doesn’t matter that you saved money and it was hit by inflation. The point is that you saved money. What results from your actions can never be guaranteed. The point is that you did what you thought was right.
i did it and somehow regret it i suppose? if only i am not that nice and good, i might get better results, you know not gotten scammed or trapped by somebody evil.
Because it’s constructive, simply put an explicit and constant effort. Your work is being cooped by other people, but it’s your work nonetheless. Evolve to find better ways to protecting it if you can - is the general notion. Your mileage may vary.
i am not really understand that, can you give some example of it?
You’re not a quitter, just hang in there. That’s what it boils down to.
im at my limit dude, its been years and its not getting any better.
To be kind is to hope for and work toward a better world. When you are kind you do not naturally receive some “reward”, but rather give a “reward” to those you provide kindness to. The catch is that your kindness will affect a great many more than you will ever know or hear about. It is multiplied. You, every single day, benefit from the kindness of others whether you are aware of it or not. Kindness is not transactional. You give comfort and ease to those around you. The closest it gets to a transaction is that you may hope that by being kind you plant a seed in others that will grow into kindness of their own, which may in time find its way back to you.
Metaphorically, imagine a communal food pantry, where the food actually represents some abstract stockpile of kindness and goodwill in the world.
To be neutral is to bring a foodstuff you are less fond of, and take a foodstuff you are more fond of.
To be kind is to bring plentiful foodstuffs for others to enjoy, and take only what you need.
To be unkind is to take when you do not need it.
I know people have already hit you with the “kindness is its own reward” but it truly is. When I consider the profound impact on my own life because of the kindness of others, I am given the drive to try and provide that for others. What a joy it is to know that I may have helped someone get through their day just a little bit easier.
We cannot control the evils of others, but we can control the kindness of ourselves, and kindness can ease the pains caused by the evils of others.
yeah i think i am hoping too much that it will be transactional
It is never about good and evil, only about what works and what doesn’t. Contributing towards others wellbeing above your own will inevitably hurt the latter, unless you are so unshakeably well established within yourself that nothing can ever even scratch you. At the same time to even be capable to improve wellbeing of others you need your own wellbeing taken care of
And yes, wellbeing does not mean consuming more and of higher quality than someone else, it means being well
yeah i think i need to improve my wellbeing first, looking at current condition, i am totally not okay at all.
It is the best course of action, and it is my wish that your efforts bear fruit no matter what life will throw at you
thanks, yeah i hope so too.
