Still debating on whether or not I’m going to delete everything I’ve ever posted, but I’m leaving Lemmy. Will stick around as a mod for a single community but no more commenting and no more posting.
When I joined Lemmy like 3 years ago it was because this place was chill. People were more than willing to hang out and relax. Hostility wasn’t the first thing people went to. It was like reddit without the toxicity. It felt genuinely peaceful. Even if people didn’t agree, people respected one another. That’s why I loved posting content so much when I first started.
But then more and more redditors started coming over and that toxicity started to rear its head again. Now nearly every comment section I go to is just filled with the same type of reddit bickering. Arguing about tiny things or saying something is fake or the “I don’t know anything about this situation but I feel like it isn’t true therefore I don’t believe it” getting upvoted and rewarded while hesitating and looking into something is getting downvoted and ignored.
This is no longer the site that I was posting to. Fediverse or not, it doesn’t matter. The content has long since been corrupted and I don’t think there’s ever going to be a path back. Maybe I’ll start posting again in the future, not like anyone cares, but I just don’t see the point in it anymore. Everytime I post stuff I just end up with an inbox that I’ve got to go through and just get more and more depressed and deflated.
My life is fucking miserable. I am not happy. Lemmy was an escape but this place doesn’t make me happy anymore. It just compounds the misery and I don’t see the point in it. At least me sitting alone in my room, depressed and upset, won’t be made worse by having to deal with the dregs of humanity on every one of my posts.
Take care and I wish everyone the best. Everyone. I wish the trolls can be happier and can lay off. I wish the people going through shit can get a break and I wish those who are just vibing continue to do so.
I’m so tired.
I’m quite glad that people on Lemmy no longer enforce toxic positivity and just engage in debate like humans are meant to. Any sort of enforced false friendliness just feels alienating. I go on the internet to get my brain rotted out by how incorrect most people are about most things and get reassurance that this is why the world is going to hell. It might sound counterproductive, but at least it means I’m not crazy for believing that things can be good actually, and it’s entertaining because it’s all that’s left of humanity to me - to laugh at how much of a fuck up this experiment has been.
Toxicity is just disagreement, and we must fight about it to find out who’s right and formulate takes - that’s literally what actual reasoning in practice looks like.
Still, I hope you find whatever you’re looking for. I hope you get out of your depression my friend, I don’t know what it’s like but I hope it gets better soon.