This one lady is considered very kind. She is to most people, that’s why they consider her this way. The lady’s friend says they’re the problem if the lady is mean to them.

I’ve been treated very badly for having learning disabilities and attention problems. Rather than talk to me and try to help me, this lady tried to beat me up, wants to hurt me, and is now ignoring me because she said she hates me and blocked me. I’m happy without her, though.

Is it possible that she can act like this and still be a good and kind person despite hating people with problems and being a bit homophobic?

  • ComradeSharkfucker@lemmy.ml
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    2 days ago

    She cares more about how she is perceived than how she actually affects others. She decided you are someone that others won’t care if she abuses or bullies so she takes her frsutrations out on you. This is vibes based psychoanalysis but I feel I am not far off atleast.

    • permathrowaway@thelemmy.clubOP
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      2 days ago

      You probably aren’t far off. Since I have a disability and people are pissed off when I ACT DISABLED, she treats me like actual shit.

  • FoxyFerengi@lemm.ee
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    2 days ago

    People don’t always make sense in their actions, and you might be trying to spend more effort understanding her than she is worth. Many people only have shallow “relationships” or interactions with each other, so it’s possible that people you know have not gotten to know her beyond social pleasantries.

    Have you heard about Mother Theresa? How she was such a good and holy person because she dedicated herself to the poor and sick? That when she died, the was a huge movement around the world to have her become a saint? Well, the world knows now that she was cruel to all those people. And she was using her position to continue abusing people that she felt were lesser than her.

    It’s pretty clear from this post, and your other posts, that this lady is not safe for you to be around. Saying that you don’t want to be around someone should be enough, and you do not have to explain to anyone why you do not like her. I hope you have people in your life that can help keep you safe

      • Windex007@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        That’s a terrible thing to say to anyone, for any reason. I’m sorry that happened to you.

        Did they say that as soon as you arrived? Or had you been talking before that?

        Also, what is your relationship to this person?

      • Windex007@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        If this lady was walking her dog, spotted OP down the street, said “I think they have a disability” and then jogged down the street to sucker punch them, then I actually doubt OPs assertion that people generally think this lady is a good person.

        OP has correctly concluded that things aren’t adding up here. I’m taking OP at their word that they want to understand. It might be that their assessment that others see this lady as good isn’t correct. It might also be that their assessment that the reason for the “trying to beat up” wasn’t because of their disability.

        I’ve known some high-functioning autistic people who’ve gotten physically struck from saying extremely inappropriate things (from the perspective of the listener) after missing 100 social cues that people are incredibly offended. It’s unjustifiable, but I’d have been a shitty friend if I didn’t help them understand the social cues and why extremely accurate assessments should not always be vocalized… Or at least to understand how people are likely to react so they can make informed decisions.

        No idea if this is OPs sitch, but it sounds like they’re trying to navigate a scenario they don’t understand, and I know I have more to offer than affirmations if they want that.

  • Aurora@lemmy.ml
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    2 days ago

    No, this is terrible. She’s immature for not talking to you about it LOL. She should just say “Please don’t do that/Please pay attention”. You won’t know what she doesn’t like about you if she doesn’t tell you.

  • Dave.@aussie.zone
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    2 days ago

    Is it possible that she can act like this and still be a good and kind person despite hating people with problems and being a bit homophobic?

    Her kindness is conditional. For people who match those conditions that “activate” kindness, they can’t understand the problem because they don’t see the other side of her, thus it must be “your fault” somehow.

    I’ll bet that she never shows her bad side when her supporters are around. If she actually does , then I advise you to distance yourself from all of these people.

  • PunkRockSportsFan@fanaticus.social
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    2 days ago

    No.

    In the words of Shirley Bennett: “kind people are kind”

    If someone is unkind to anyone. They are unkind. It’s easy.

    Sorry you’re getting mistreated. You deserve to be loved how you are.

    • slacktoid@lemmy.ml
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      2 days ago

      This 100% OP. And even if they have issues with you you don’t ever deserve physical violence on you.