Someone asked, “Why do some British people not like Farage?” Nate White, an articulate and witty writer wrote the following response: “A few things spring to mind. Farage lacks certain qualities which the British traditionally esteem. For instance, he has no class, no charm, no coolness, no credibility, no compassion, no wit, no warmth, no wisdom, no subtlety, no sensitivity, no self-awareness, no humility, no honour and no grace – all qualities, funnily enough, with which Boris lacked. So, the stark contrast does throw Farage’s limitations into embarrassingly sharp relief. Plus, we like a laugh. And while Farage may be laughable, he has never once said anything wry, witty, or even faintly amusing – not once, ever. I do not say that rhetorically, I mean it quite literally: not once, not ever. And that fact is particularly disturbing to the British sensibility – for us, to lack humour is almost inhuman. But with Farage, it is a fact. He does not even seem to understand what a joke is – his idea of a joke is a crass comment, an illiterate insult, a casual act of cruelty. Farage is a troll. And like all trolls, he is never funny and he never laughs; he only crows or jeers. And scarily, he does not just talk in crude, witless insults – he actually thinks in them. His mind is a simple bot-like algorithm of petty prejudices and automatic nastiness. There is never any under-layer of irony, complexity, nuance, or depth. It is all surface. Some might see this as refreshingly upfront. Well, we do not. We see it as having no inner world, no soul. And in Britain we traditionally side with David, not Goliath. All our heroes are plucky underdogs: Robin Hood, Dick Whittington, Oliver Twist. Farage is neither plucky, nor an underdog. He is the exact opposite of that. He is not even a spoiled rich-boy, or a greedy fat-cat. He is more a fat white slug. A Jabba the Hutt of privilege. And worse, he is that most unforgivable of all things to the British: a bully and racist. That is, except when he is among bullies; then he suddenly transforms into a snivelling sidekick instead. There are unspoken rules to this stuff – the Queensberry rules of basic decency – and he breaks them all. He punches downwards – which a gentleman should, would, could never do – and every blow he aims is below the belt. He particularly likes to kick the vulnerable or voiceless – and he kicks them when they are down. So the fact that a significant minority – perhaps a few of us– of look at what he does, listen to what he says, and then think ‘Yeah, he seems like my kind of guy’ is a matter of some confusion and no little distress to British people, given that: You do not need a particularly keen eye for detail to spot a few flaws in the man. This last point is what especially confuses and dismays British people, and many other people too; his faults seem pretty hard to miss. After all, it is impossible to read a single tweet, or hear him speak a sentence or two, without staring deep into the abyss. He turns being artless into an art form; he is a Picasso of pettiness; a Shakespeare of shit. His faults are fractal: even his flaws have flaws, and so on ad infinitum. God knows there have always been stupid people in the world, and plenty of nasty people too. But rarely has stupidity been so nasty, or nastiness so stupid. He makes Johnson look trustworthy and Liz Truss look smart. In fact, if Frankenstein decided to make a monster assembled entirely from human flaws – he would make a Farage. And a remorseful Doctor Frankenstein would clutch out big clumps of hair and scream in anguish: ‘My God… what… have… I… created? If being a twat was a TV show, Farage would be the boxed set.

No, especially as some of it’s being delivered by the Royal Mail.

However, you can post it back to “Reform UK, Freepost RTLT-ZXHY-KSDC, 83 Victoria Street, London SW1H OHW” and cause them to pay Royal Mail a second time.

Wasn’t Farage the one who broke it with Brexit lies and false promises?

“Reform UK government will deliver in 100 days - or I will blame everyone else but myself”

Returning in Freepost and using as fire starter have already been suggested. I would also consider as a handy way to soak up bin juices, or as toilet paper substitute. Might be on the rough side, mind.

The next time you see them, tell them

I support French asylum seekers having bum sex on Princess Diana’s grave.

That’ll get them to stop!

I had one of these come through the door yesterday. It’s bad enough I have to look at this twat on the news. I can choose to turn off my phone, TV, etc. But now his twatish frog face is appearing in my home!

I get political post is allowed. But can I do anything about being forced to look at a certain person, logo or specific images?

very farquaadesque pledge there Nigel

But it’s free for patriots. Why do you hate Ann Widdecombe???

(Jokes aside, good question - I would also like to unsubscribe from this trash.)

Issue 001

Trouble was brewing.

Brick up your letterbox

You can opt out of door to door shite delivered by royal mail.
https://share.google/aimode/bmLEYa7pLrG9NZFYl

I got one of these.

Fun fact: As far as I’m concerned (the law may disagree), anything which is posted through my door without my permission is completely 100% my property, to do what I want with.

Every image, logo, text, photograph etc - all mine. So I can scan, copy, paste, edit, adjust, reprint, repost everything wherever and however I want.

If they didn’t want me to do that, then why did they post it through my door? My terms and conditions are clearly displayed in a thought in my imagination. It’s not my fault if they’re too lazy to read them.