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Picard didn’t need to say it, it was in the look he gave Riker.


From the old Rom-posting days.

You say you’re nasty pirates
Scheming, thieving, bad bushwhackers?
From what I’ve seen, I tell you
You’re not pirates! You’re just slackers!
Completely flat water, all sails furled, captain and first officer without uniform rank distinctions hanging midships looking at the quarterdeck, one single sailor…
Hit it Elwood
Sir, this is a wedding.
Oh am I marrying 1990s Riker? Yeah ok I’m in.
Who isn’t
Our doctors arrrr excellent.
Eye-patches not required.

No bidet and a bunch of sweaty dudes that smell more and more like dried festering old fecal matter

and hear the lamentation of their women
(and maybe driving carousel weeeeeeee)








