Its the 14th century and you’ve had no time to prepare, after you’re done reading this post you are snapped. What do you do?
Die a slow death from hyperglycemia once my pump runs out of insulin.
Infect the indigenous population with some god awful pathogen they have no defense against.
Die to a pathogen I have no defense against.
Die to the indigenous population due to being a white dude in pre-contact North America.
It uh… wouldn’t be pretty.
First I would seek the attention of the local ruler by cooking interesting dishes with modern knowledge.
Then I would ask him to create an akademy. I don’t know the details but I know what can be known. Intelligent people will reinvent the knowledge.
Some side businesses should make enough money that the akademy and thus further development doesn’t entirely rely on the king.
Build cities with public transport and no cars, because there is no car.
Success.
Great idea with the food. Probably won’t get called a witch while building trust. Although I have no confidence in my ability to recognize any vegetable or spice, but hopefully a brine would be enough.
Let me cook you something AMAZING!
First I need some curry…uh…okay, do you have salt? WHAT?
Alright, where is the oven? Time to prepare you some amazing lasagna! Where do you keep your noodles? No noodles? I guess I can hack it with potatoes.
…PO-TA-TOES! YOU…WHAT???
Okay nevermind, let me show you why you need to stop spending all your money on survival in warfare and instead fund my school! I can teach you to…uh…tell you about things we have in the future. No, I don’t know how to create any of that. But trust me bro, just give me money. No need to tie me to your trebuchet like that, I’m sure I can remember how to build an airplane somehowAHHHHHHHHHH
You tried.
Edit: But don’t worry, your myriads of novel diseases in your body will pretty much wipe out the continent you spawned on. Revenge!
Nobody would be able to understand me because English has diverged so far from 12th century English that it’s a different language. Also I’d be in north America where nobody had even seen a white person. Additionally, I’m 20 ft above the ground right now in a building that didn’t exist back then. Finally, I’d be rightfully blamed for bringing plague to the native tribes of the area and likely killed.
Assuming those hurdles were all cleared: I’m a mechanical engineer. So, I’d tell the natives where iron ore, coal, and oil was buried and how to extract and refine it. Tell them how to make gunpowder. Speed run making steam engines and lathes. Get north american natives armed, industrialized, and organized against the external European threat.
Tell them how to make gunpowder.
That right here is all you need. If you can actually forge a gun and show them how to make gunpowder, you don’t need anything else. Although even then you would probably be executed shortly after for being a threat to the nobility.
Uhh anyone know where to get estrogen injections in the 14th century?
I bet there is a crunchy mom that can tell you what plant to eat, but there’s like a 70/30 chance its gonna kill you instead.
I could probably discover electricity, depending on where I landed. Jewelers of the time could make wire, copper was common, and magnets (lodestones) had been discovered. Realistically though I’d be a dumb giant (ie, speak no known languages of the time and statistically I’d have like a foot on the “tall” people of the era). I’d probably try to find some party trick that looked like magic to people of the era then hope that people would welcome and try to integrate me rather than burning me as a witch. Then I’d probably die in a week or two anyway to some disease lol
Coating wires to make windings may prove tricky tho
The party trick thing reminded me of a book series called Magic 2.0 that I read a while back . This guy figures out that the universe is a simulation and basically hacks the code; now he can jump through time as he pleases. He goes back to the Middle Ages and brings plastic wrap with him and calls it clear paper, which convinces everyone that he’s a wizard. It was a fun read but got dumb around the 3rd-ish book.
Well, I’m in America, so…
I guess I’d prep the natives to help put up a proper fight. Find a way to teach them that white people (like myself) carry diseases and to stay away and keep them away. If they land on your shores, drive them back. Never let them get a foothold. I’d try to convince them that I was a demon that got away from the other demons to warn of our coming.
I’d do my best to make it so nobody remembered the name Christopher Columbus except as the idiot that died because he thought the world was much smaller than it is and never returned from his voyage.
Most likely, you’d just start their mass depopulation pandemic a bit earlier.
white people (like myself) carry diseases
Congratulations, you already killed them all
I’d kill your ancestors.
I’d be dead in the vacuum of space. You never mentioned that I’d just go back in time, you forgot the coordinates. Now I’m floating, dead. Thanks man.
This. Once you understand enough about the universe how all coordinates are relative and everything is moving relative to everything else… Like, how the fuck is time travel supposed to work it it was anywhere like this naive movie idea of it? Time travel Hollywood style is literally not a continuous operation and as such absolutely unphysical.
Well since all cordninates are realative, and your relative position to earth is unchanging, wouldn’t that mean that everything else moves around you while you and the earth stand still and go back in time?
If the earth is going back in time as well then the whole planet as it is today would begin to freeze as a rogue planet unconnected to any star.
There’s a reason the tardis is a time and space ship.
Start a cult.
Everything I’ve seen for the last decade indicates it’s pretty easy and highly profitable.
and you have all the knowledge of what cults already took off like wildfire. Mormonism for example, that shit is gold.
You don’t even have to show the gold. Just say you saw it and it’s now in that tent over there. No you can’t go in. This is what was written on it though. Oh it’s in a language only I can read. Don’t worry, I’ll translate. Give me your wife.
find the nearest sword and belly flop on its pointy side
I don’t think I know a single language from the time, so I’m probably getting murdered because I’m a strange foreigner who can’t defend themselves with words.
I don’t know how to refine oil, but knowing that its refinable into diesel/gasoline is a pretty good start to looking for it. A head start on murdering some sperm whales for lighting industry seems easy enough to figure out. Partnering with metal smiths who might have a clue on making gun barrels, and pipe’s in general that could be used for advanced weaponry, would be an easy path to get governments to give me a ton of money for weapons research by just showing them some drawings. Doesn’t really matter if I ever figure out how to do it, just the vision of what is possible would make me richer than Musk. Richer if I can help enslave all of humanity to one empire.
That’s 1375.
Not good, not bad. Depends on where you ended up on the globe. There absolutely is civilization, but it’s all kings and Tsars and the like. The English and French Hundred Years War is winding down but the plague really did a number on Europe. Lots of war in India. It wasn’t a great time in the Middle East what with the Crusades and all. The Egyptians are conquering Armenia. The Songhai Emprire is growing in Eastern Africa. Southeast Asia had a lot of conquest and a large kingdom growing, might not have been so bad as long as you landed on the winning side. The Ming Dynasty just started in China.
So it’s not like you ended up in pre-civilization or among dinosaurs or something. There are plenty of people around, but it’s still an age of war and conquest. Your best bet to have a great life would be to ally yourself with a strong leader and give them advancements to help that leader “win”. Of course, if he were defeated, you’d be slowly tortured and killed by the opposing side.
I would use the superstitions of the people of the area to scare them away from me and my space. I would build a Catalan forge and a smelter that is powered by falling water. I would make gunpowder but not share the recipe. I would also distill alcohol for sale and for hygiene. I would use Leedskalnins PMH to create permanent magnets and use them to make electricity. Electric fences also help keep the superstitious barbarians away. I would also be a beekeeper.
Wow you know how to do all that stuff right now off the top of your head without books or instructions? I am impressed. I feel like the best I would be able to do alcohol wise is distilled prison hooch. Like I know the basic priceable but not the recipe.
People were mining, smelting, and forging many metals 650 years ago. The forge isn’t a complicated device. A coal fire with forced air to raise the temperature. Pressurized air can be taken from falling water. There are always bubbles. Leeskalnin’s PMH is really simple. If you have copper, silver or aluminum wire and Iron, you can make a permanent magnet. Moving copper, aluminum or silver through a magnetic field gives you electricity. Bees are not too hard to keep. Make a wood house with a small entrance for them and bait the inside with some beeswax and honeycomb and you can get them to move in. I worked at a fireworks factory a long time ago. Gunpowder is not hard to make. Finding potassium nitrate would be the hard part.
People were mining, smelting, and forging many metals 650 years ago.
yep, 3000bc+ going back to copper and bronze.
but there’s a tremendous jump from being able to smelt metal in small quantities - obtaining enough ores for each, for example, is probably more than one person work to produce anything usable. smelting, gathering wood or other fuel, building ovens and water wheels etc… and no one to call on for expertise…
hard couple of decades to produce some wire :D
primitive technology youtube channel has him trying to make iron for a few years with everything handmade. watch it to see what you’d be up against.
650 years ago steel was pretty common. Copper, silver and gold were used for coins and jewelry. Finding the supplies to make iron rods and copper wire wouldn’t bee the hardest part. The hard part would be making a battery. I should look up the Baghdad Battery again to see how it was made. I would probably also have to worry about being burned at the stake for practicing alchemy.
Nothing. I’d sit under an tree and enjoy the peace and quiet. No trump. No DC. No MAGA. No reporters. No non stop ads. No social media. No Google. No Elon. No bezos. The list goes on. Sure I’d probably die of some random disease or bandits. But I’d be okay with it at that point.
Well you can do that today. Find a tree out in the middle of nowhere and sit under it without any electronic devices. Then you are oblivious to all that stuff. You may be bothered by the fact that the things are still happening, but there are also plenty of horrific things happening in that time period you went to, you just won’t be keeping track of them.
Bruv I don’t think I could forget that stuff is happening just because I’m not reading it.
Well you can do that today. Find a tree out in the middle of nowhere and sit under it without any electronic devices. Then you are oblivious to all that stuff.
There is much wisdom buried in what seems like a simple comment here.
Even if you aren’t in the middle of nowhere, you can find or create your oasis.
