Being alone.
Everyone’s talking about a loneliness epidemic and I’m here wishing I had fewer people around me.
Most of them I love, for sure, but the freedom and relaxation of not having anyone around is addicting and I haven’t had a good hit since 2020
Not to brag, but god I love waking up to a clean, quiet, empty house with my dogs every day. I don’t understand why people want a spouse or kids.
There was a solid 18 months where I woke up to a kitty cuddled in my arms and no alarm, no kids, no SO. Just work at some time in a few hours and a purring kitty.
I miss it. Even though I could see my breath in my own bedroom.
Peace is criminally underrated.
Me, neither. The peace and quiet is worth more than anything.
A measurable attention span.
Oh but it CAN be measured.
It is simply that value is too short for what you need it to be.
Wait, what were we talking about? /jk
the trick is long attention span. the longer, the more you can
I feel like long attention spans would also help out in other facets of life.
A loving family
My heart goes out to you, sweet stranger. ❤️
As in parents or spouse and kids?
I’m so sorry, right there with ya
An interest in dogs. I really dislike them as far as having to live with one which makes dating literally impossible. Using dating sites over the years I’ve seen probably 80%+ profiles mention loving dogs, needing dogs, stealing your dog, owning all the dogs, some profiles even start with “blah blah dog.”
I hate that there’s such an obsession with dogs and travel… :(
Do you like cats? Or any other animals?
I love cats! I have a monkey kitty of my own, I’ve just never been fond of dogs unfortunately.
Oh, you will have no problem finding an amazing person at some point in time then. Cats are better anyway ;)
Me and my GF met online and we’re both crazy cat people (our sons are two beautiful furry brothers). Just show that you’re a cat person instead! Hope you find what you’re looking for.
There are quite enough cat ladies and boys.
I for one like bozh but have a 60% tendency to get a dog first.Kitty
Executive function.
The ability to snap my fingers. I can barely make a sound when doing it.
the trick is long fingers. the longer, the bigger the snap
I feel like long fingers would also help out in other facets of life.
Can confirm, got long fingers, can reach the bottom of most jars.
Make an OK symbol with your middle finger
Move every finger except your index finger to your palm as close to your wrist as possible (in a comfortable manner)
Adjust your thumb so it is on the edge of your middle finger closer to your pinkie (this is to cause more friction between your middle finger and thumb)
Press down with your middle finger and then move your thumb, as quickly as possible, to around where your index finger is
If it works, it’ll cause some burning on your finger and a loud noise, you can massage your palm where the middle finger hits if it’s still muffled, it’s likely stiff.
Which finger do you use other than your thumb? I use my rong finger, but I’ve seen others that use the middle. I’m sure some wierdo is out there mastering the pointer thumb technique
Middle. I’ve never heard of people using any other fiber, so it’s what I use.
I wish I didn’t have this giant penis.
I’m constantly tripping over mine
Well spit it out
The desire to have sex? Sure would make relationships easier.
I’m ace in a demi relationship, but I’m NGL, it’s still hard. I’m suuuuper glad sex isn’t the focus of our relationship and we’ve been going strong for a while, but it does also add complexity
I understand this well. Spent a few decades in dysfunctional relationships rooted in my lack of sexual desire. Happily married to another ace woman today, where sex is only ever suggested as part of joke and we’ve never even came close. She is liberating, freeing, incredible and safe.
Yet I still hold a lot of guilt from previous partners who spent time thinking something was wrong with them or I was cheating because I always made “not tonight” excuses for several years straight. It wasn’t fair to either of us, but my lack of introspection, self-honesty and fear of being alone kept us years of strife.
Things are wonderful now, no complaints but GAWD a lot of heart ache could’ve been avoided if I had a *normal" sex drive.
Congratulations 👏. Can I ask, how you view nudity and you and/or your partner being naked in front of each other? Genuinely curious!
While we don’t make a habit of it, both of us walk in front of the other when getting out of the shower or getting dressed for the day. It’s just a part of life, nothing sexual about it. We’ve also given various small compliments about each other, generally after one of us gets a tattoo, but we have both discussed than anything about each other genitals is just weird and unwanted. We really are the greatest for each other. 😂
Having said that, she asked me to post a picture of her breasts a lil while ago, in my post history, but that’s the most sexual thing either of us have suggested. And it was just taking a few photos than a movie, not like past GFs that wanted to turn that in to sex.
Now I’m curious myself, is nudity a hurdle for you? Fully valid and no judgement, just wondering. :)
Thanks for your story. I find it very interesting! This is just something I wondered about, whether it would be aversion or just a disinterest. I don’t know many ace/aro people that well to ask.
No, I am neither and am in a relationship that involves it all. We are very comfortable with each other haha.
Glad you found your other half.
I’m aro/ace and sometimes I feel like this. But I guess what I want is just another person to have a connection with. If more people were aro/ace my problem would also be solved. Still I do sometimes wonder what I’m missing out on. Everyone seems to like it, yet I find it yucky. There’s plenty of other things in life to enjoy though, so no biggie
In my case, I just feel like it’s unfair to my girlfriend. I know it’s not my fault, and I’m not obligated to give her something I don’t enjoy myself - but the reality is that something that’s a big part of most relationships is missing from ours, and it’s because of me. We’re in an open relationship, so she doesn’t have to go entirely without, but it’s still not ideal.
Wish I could whistle but I guess I just gotta practice. Also my friends can do that thing where you can move your pectorals but I can’t do that
Do you go to the gym, or do pushups frequently? If you do, you should manage to do that thing with the pectorals after a while
the trick is long lips. the longer, the higher the pitch
I feel like long lips would also help out in other facets of life.
Hair
the trick is long hair. the longer, the more hair you’ll have
I feel like long hair would also help out in other facets of life.
The thing that gets people to get out of the house and do things with other people.
Not like a vehicle, or transportation but the other thing
I’m a shut-in and I’ll say it doesn’t help living in a sparse area with only a bike*. I usually just ride on the trail to a very close bridge, sometimes I go to the closest town over and buy a few things from the produce section from the local grocery store and that’s it.
Admittedly, I probably still wouldn’t be very social in a denser place (money, but also other issues).
* I don’t want to drive, though lots of ditches around here and there is no north/south trail. So it is a factor.
Oh I got one of those too i need the thing that gets me out of the house. Like a thing that makes me leave the house to go do
A half-decent singing voice.
To illustrate how bad my singing is: our school did a musical every year. One year it was Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. The music department set up auditions. First they did a speaking audition, after which I was short-listed for Joseph. Then they did the singing audition. I ended up being ‘one of the brothers, the one who doesn’t really sing anything’.
I don’t even want to be an awesome singer, just be able to carry a tune recognisably.
Practice. A lot.
In my teens I wasn’t able to carry a tune at all. Our music teacher marked me as “hopeless” after hearing a me singing a few lines.
This pissed me off royally. I had no desire or illusions of becoming a great singer, but I would not accept being “hopeless”. So I started practicing with simple children’s song melodies and recorded my singing with an old cassette recorder. It was indeed pretty awful at first, but I slowly got better. Then I got my driver’s license and could sing along the songs from the radio and my cassettes while driving alone, it was a big step up from singing quietly in my room.
I also started playing the guitar to get a better understanding of musical theory, which was helpful. After I had learned the basics of playing rhythm guitar firmly I learned to play the piano. I believe that singing the melodies while playing them on the piano was essential to my development, since I could instantly hear if I did not hit the correct note.
By my mid-twenties I could already carry tunes easily and even got a complements about my singing voice. Key changes and modulations were still pretty challenging, but I kept on practising whenever I found the time.
Now in my forties I can repeat a melody correctly after hearing it once or twice and I consider myself a decent singer. I don’t sing karaoke or any solo performances, but I do love singing backup or as part of a group.
If my music teacher hadn’t embarrassed me publicly all those years ago, I most likely would have never put any effort in getting better at singing or learning to play instruments. I started this lifelong project purely out of spite, but it became a major and very dear part of my life. I even owe my marriage to music, while we were still dating my wife confessed to me that she most likely wouldn’t have even noticed me if I hadn’t been playing the guitar at that one summer party. Thankfully I wasn’t too hammered at that time ;)
Practice. A lot.
Please, I don’t want my neighbors to kill themselves.
Singing is 10% talent and 90% practice.
You do you, of course, you don’t, 't have to sing. But if you do it you will get better at it.
recorded my singing with an old cassette recorder
Hmm, perhaps this is the key. I sing a lot, in the car, or the shower, or when no-one is around, so I get practice in but I don’t (can’t) hear what I’m singing properly.
A brain that can produce a stable level of serotonin and not go haywire all because the seasons changed.
That and being neurotypical, my life would be much easier if I didn’t have ADHD
I feel you, although I’m not sure this counts as minor
It is minor. People that are neurotypical don’t even think about it and take it for granted. For them it is normal, so it’s not a big deal, they don’t think there’s a struggle there because they don’t struggle.
Legs. I’m a double amputee, and I miss them.
the trick is long legs. the longer, the more leg you can lose
I feel like long legs would also help out in other facets of life.
Like, if you have long pants
You’re a menace
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Relatively? Yeah. It’s minor. Most people don’t even consider having legs.
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When was the last time you thought: hmm… I have legs. Outside of this post obviously
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No allergies. Im allergic to dairy, eggs and most nuts. I’m not lactose intolerant, which I wish I had, because then I could be in the bathroom for a few hours instead of a hospital for a few days. So many things have milk in them, and the few things that don’t put eggs in them too. I can’t eat out.
